After Raegan (my third) was born, the common question was "Are you done now?" Apparently, we were complete. In the eyes of others.
When I was expecting our fourth daughter, Alana (Raegan was 8 months old), there were those who acted like we were irresponsible. completely in over our heads. and dangerously bordering on overpopulating the earth.
The questions of "Are you done now?" turned to statements: "Surely, you're done."
And those that gave us any grace for being pregnant "yet again" figured it was because we were trying for that boy. Clearly, we had the right to try for "that boy" if nothing else. *rolling my eyes*
Well, that statement has changed yet again. And I'm completely baffled because the newest question is:
"Are you SURE you're done?...Why?! That's a big decision...maybe you shouldn't make it so hastily."
Just because she's so cute! ;)Even our midwife and delivery nurse were insistent that we shouldn't stop at five. I assured them we were done. Neither seemed to agree. :)
Who knows what happened inside the thinking of those *ahem* interested in the size of our growing family.
- Maybe they finally clued in to how adorable our girlie troop is
- Or maybe they see that we aren't irresponsible but just two people in love who want to leave a lasting legacy on this earth
- Or maybe they just figure that breeding is our favorite pasttime so why fight the inevitable *wry grin*
The whole thing amuses me. :)
But regardless of how others have changed their stance on our "family planning", my girls are a different story. For they've always been very adamant, especially from the beginning of this pregnancy, that they did NOT want this to be the last baby we ever have.
Uh...what?
...............
Today I asked the girls what they wanted to see happen this year. what they would like to see the Lord do in their lives.
One girl said: "Go to the waterpark." We teach our girls to dream big in this house. *laughing*
Another daughter said: "For you to have another baby." *sigh*
............
The first time that little sentiment was announced at the dinner table, I didn't know what to say. Here I've been feeling like the reject-of-a-mother, neglecting them when pregnant (oh, AND also during the sleepless state of newborn haze!) and they're begging for more?!
In my way of thinking...seven pregnancies in eight-and-a-half years ...that's added up to a heckuva lot of time where I'm not getting to BE the Mom that I want to be to the children I already have.
Don't they remember the fact that I am a total leech when pregnant?!
Honestly, before now I didn't consider my "leeching" to be a that big of a deal. I figure they're so young that I doubt they'll even remember, in much detail, my laying on the couch for months on end.
I doubt they remember the times that I let them watch hours of TV because I just couldn't function during the first trimester toilet hugging sessions... or the third trimester exhaustion marathon... or the mind-numbing sleepless nights of a newborn.
But NOW ...I can't say I feel the same way. They're growing sooo fast and before I know it, they'll be hitting adolescents. Charis is already 7!
Excuse me while I hyperventilate a bit.
I want to have ample time to really invest in my girls. to have a lot of one-on-one dates where I can begin to build a relationship where we reallllly talk. to have both the brainpower and the free time to seize those rare moments when deep talks suddenly emerge.
I want to really invest in our relationships BEFORE they become teenagers.... with crazy social lives. driver's licenses. peer pressure. and boyfriends.
Because in my thinking (and experience), it'll be a little too late to just be starting.
I want my girls to feel like I've taken the time to really get to know them. that I've slowed down to really listen to them. and that I've given them devoted time and sincere recognition apart from their sisters.
And I know me. While I'm a great multi-tasker, I don't want to "Multi-task" parenthood. I want my attentions to NOT be divided between diapering and dating.
There's so much I could say (and may document later on) about the countless circumstances that have brought us to this place...
But the gist is this: Every baby has been such a blessing to our family. If God were to surprise us and give us more, I know we'd be more than thrilled. My heart is just to make sure that we cherish the ones that He's already blessed us with.
So yeah, I'm thinking we're complete. Now that the public-at-large is begging us to have more. *hahaha*
