Miraculous healing

Some people think that miracles only happen in Third World Countries. But thankfully, God is on the move.

ALL Around the World.

Here's one story...my friend's miraculous testimony of the Lord healing her paralysis.

View Here.

The anchors of my heart

(Def) Anchor:

• A source of security or stability.
• A heavy object attached to keep the vessel in place

During different seasons of my life, there are times when "everyday things" will suddenly impact me in new and fresh ways. coming out of no where and evoking a deep response that would not have happened were I in another place emotionally.

Like a worship song. or a scripture verse. or a piece of Death By Chocolate Cake. You know... the important, spiritual things in this world. *wry grin*

The whole Pregnant Season, for me, always seems to bring about these unexpected heart connections.

Probably because I tend to press in deeper to the Father's heart: clinging to him for peace and comfort and whatever else he has to offer as I set firm my faith in His promises to me (regarding labor and delivery based on the cross canceling out pain and sorrow).


THE VERSE:

One night as I was reading the Word....

Wait, that sounds too pretty. like I was having some all-together, intimate moment where angels were quietly humming in the background as my halo glistened softly against a backdrop of open heavens.

Because trust me, I wasn't anything close to ...*ahem*...that.

I was stressed. probably on the verge of tears. and trying to take deep breaths in attempts to prevent hyperventilation. Bible Roulette was my game of choice, as I groped for anything that would bring me comfort.

There. That paints a much more accurate picture. Wouldn't want you go picturin' me as anything less than a crazy-emotional, woman in the throes of the last weeks of pregnancy. ;)

SO there I was, randomly opening my Bible, hoping to find something. And God, in his infinite mercy, showed me the following:

"Thus says the Lord God: If the prince makes a gift to any of his sons out of his inheritance, it shall belong to his sons; it is their property by inheritance.

But if he makes a gift out of his inheritance to one of his servants, it shall be his to the year of liberty, then it shall revert (back) to the prince.

Only his sons may KEEP a GIFT from his inheritance..." Ezekiel 46:16-17

This was HUGE to me!! I've mentioned that this go round, I don't feel as "on top" of the whole interceding for the delivery. That instead of feeling like I had hours to press in to a place of deeper faith (like last time), I was just having to trust that God still remains true to Himself and His promise, regardless of my being able to do ...anything relatively deep.

Jesus, The Prince (like in that above verse), told me when I was pregnant with Charis that the supernatural, painfree delivery was a gift to me. He reminded me of that promise a few weeks ago, and then He told Jet the same thing out of the blue: that this delivery was to be a gift to me.

Then I find this completely "random" verse highlighting the fact that Jesus does not take back gifts given to his children. that because I am his child, the gifts he has given me before remain my inheritance now.

As "duh" as it may seem to you...it was SO eye-opening (not to mention comforting) to me!

And I do believe at that point there may have been angels humming in the background. You know, as I sat on the couch and stared at the scripture verse in awe. ;)

For the past week, that verse has been read and reread, as I prepare for what looks like a SOON delivery.


THE SONG:

During the last pregnancy, there was one song that particularly ministered to me. And I listened to it over and over on my MP3 player as I labored in the delivery room. Shane and Shane's song "Yearn".

The song ministered directly to the place that the Lord had me.

Last week, the Lord gave me another worship song. One that spoke to my heart directly on the very things that I've been warring for this go round:

That God has done it all, even when my heart and flesh fail...that as the day draws near, my faith will become seen. Because *HE* has overcome.

...which has nothing to do with me, outside of receiving the gift He's offering me: The Cross that did it all, that holds the very Victory that I'm seeking.

I told Jet about it last night and just sat, with tears streaming down my face, as we listened to it together.

Chris Tomlin's "I will rise".







His faithfulness to walk me through this time, even when I'm feeling emotionally unstable continues to be my anchor. my encouragement. my hope.

Defining the meaning of Sold-Out. For my kids' sake.

"She's one of those radical Christians. She's so spiritually minded that she's no earthy good, you know?"

Excuse me? Are you stinkin' kidding me!? She's a radical, spiritually minded Christian? ...you mean as opposed to some other kind?

As in the kind of Christians that just hold fast to the title, but not the person of Jesus? the politically correct, and therefore socially safe, kind that have no faith. hold no power. and see no breakthrough?

Are those the other type of "Christians" that you speak of? Just wanting to be clear here. You know, so I can intelligently follow along with your pathetic line of reasoning.

I'm sorry but comments like these enrage me.

Actually, I take that back. I'm not sorry. I think we, as a nation, are where we are today because of too many "sorry" Christians.

Christians who apologize for not being tolerant enough. who apologize for not embracing everyone's ridiculous notions of right and wrong... or the lack thereof.

Christians who apologize for keeping other Believers accountable to the Truth. Christians who, ultimately, allow themselves to be silenced from speaking the Name of Jesus, resigned to allow the "Majority" make the new and improved rules of conduct.

I'm not sorry. But I am mad.

Because it's mindsets like these (that are even in the Church) that can make the "radical" Believer feel like they need to just hop off the mothership and get a grip on reality.

"Earth to Christian. Do you read me?"


Uh...? Totally correct me if I'm wrong, but it seems to me that the only thing that's going to be of "Earthly good" is if we get our minds set on the things of the Spirit. So we can pull down Heaven into this realm.

Does "...Your Kingdom come...on earth as it is in heaven..." ring a bell?

One thing that I decided this week is that I refuse to raise "American Christians". Children who grow up thinking lukewarm is the norm.

I want my children to know that there is life outside of our little corner of the planet. That there are Christians around the world risking humiliation, torture, and death. just so they can praise Jesus and embrace the title of Christian.

instead of casually throwing it around like it's some club where you piously pay your weekly dues by sitting on a pew.

Richard Wurmbrand, in his book, "Tortured for Christ" says:

"It must be understood that there are no nominal, halfhearted, lukewarm Christians in Russia or China. The price Christians pay is far too great. The next point to remember is that persecution has always produced a better Christian- a witnessing Christian, a soul-winning Christian. communist persecution has backfired and produced serious, dedicated Christians such as are rarely seen in free lands. These people cannot understand how anyone can be a Christian and not want to win every soul they meet."

I want my girls to understand this from the get-go. to intercede for our Christian Siblings who are risking everything to lift up the name of Jesus.

I don't want them to take for granted that we have a hundred Bibles at our finger tips. and a church on every corner. and worship music on the radio.

I want them to understand that we are in a battle. whether we see it in this realm/land (yet) or not, it's there. They need to know this. so they can be equipped. so they can be BOTH spiritually minded and of earthly good.

You know, like Jesus was.

*****
If you are interested...you can get a kid-friendly newsletter version of Voice of the Martyrs. For free.

I just signed up today so I don't know what all it includes. But I do know that the Voice of the Martyrs newsletters (adult versions) we've received come with maps outlining the nations where Christians are considered illegal. or endangered.

Those maps will hang above our map of the world. on the wall of our dining room. so my girls are reminded to pray for them daily. as am I.

http://www.persecution.com/

http://www.kidsofcourage.com/

Caution. Rough road ahead. Enter at your own risk.

Raw.

I think you can handle it. If not, turn aside. This will not be the blog for you. But if you can handle a woman going emotionally bare, for the sake of documenting her journey with Christ, then hang on.

Because I'm thinking it's about to get ugly.

I've talked before about my faith walk with Christ: He asked me to believe for a pain-free delivery. I said Sure. I believed him...he provided. The four times I've walked that journey, while they've been a stretch, has always drawn me deeper into Him.

He's asked me to pray for people. To pray and believe Him for healing. So I did. And I've seen miraculous healings. Physical infirmities disappear before my eyes. A lame woman getting up and walking away for the first time in her life. Pains instantaneously leaving people's bodies.

He's allowed me to experience life inside the realm of the Spiritual. I've smelled things that weren't of this realm. seen things. felt things. heard things. All supernatural. All mind-boggling.

I know he exists. It's not a question I have to entertain. For I've seen too much to even begin to doubt that.

But one area where my heart still breaks...where my faith continues to waiver...where I feel He has continually let me down...is in the area of finances.

Essentially, I have faith for crazy, miraculous things to occur. as long as it doesn't involve my checkbook. Then, I just have a hard time holding out hope.

Now before you go all Pharisaical on me, know that I don't mean to imply that he owes me anything. If all he did was save me from my sins and promise me a life in Eternity with Him, that would be enough.

I know that when I accepted Him as my Savior, I was not promised an easy life. A life without trial or struggle or opposition. I know that when I signed on to be a Christian, I was, essentially, signing a blank contract.

An agreement that metaphorically said that though I didn't know what the future held, I would trust that to Him. and Him alone.

Okay? So I know this. And I willingly follow Him. I love him. I will serve Him. I will trust him. Even if it is by choice...without constant proof of His intervention in my life.

Yet

The arena of finances leaves me wondering so much. Because it is in that place where he continually gives us detailed promises regarding what's to come. Promises that literally number in the dozens. Promises that remain unfulfilled.

He has given me more financial promises that any other promise I've ever heard from him.

Prophetic words about finances given to us by people who had no idea that their exact words were mirroring what the Lord had already spoken weeks earlier. Dreams that spell out the financial abundance that is to come. An angel that loudly proclaimed it to me (in a dream). And personal words spoken from His heart to mine during the random times of my day. Time and time again.

Even after delivering Alana and having a supernatural birth, the Lord didn't skip a beat. He challenged me to up my faith and believe him in the area of financial provision. knowing full well the massive battle of trust this would be for me.

Bottom line: He's promised us for the last seven years that we'd be blessed beyond measure financially. And while I truly don't care about amassing wealth, what gets me is we're experiencing the exact opposite. A place where we're not sure how we're even going to be able to pay some bills.

And it's in this place that my heart before God is so fragile. A place where I inwardly ask:

"Lord? Do you not see? Do you not have compassion? What are you asking of me? How am I to release your promise? Is there something I need to be doing to call it forth? Because honestly, I feel I've exhausted my every outlet. And I need you to move."

That said, I have a hard time when I hear people saying "Praise Jesus! He always provides." or "You can't out give God."

Because this is not a phenomenon that we've experienced. We've given away half of our money for missions at one point. Only to have the IRS mistakenly clean our the rest of our money, without our knowledge. Putting us in the red until they finally agreed to fix their error.

We've given away very expensive things...to people who needed it...just because he told us to. Even when that meant us going without. in our own need. Etc Etc etc

We continue to tithe, knowing that may very well cause us to be late on some bills.

Do I say this to pat myself on the back? NO. I say it because it's truth. and because it truly baffles me to no end. For scripture says

"Bring the whole tithe into the storehouse, so that there may be food in My house, and test Me now in this, says the LORD of hosts, if I will not open for you the windows of heaven and pour out for you a blessing until it overflows." Malachi 3:10

For years we've blindly trusted. Given him ample opportunity to intervene and open up the windows of heaven. only to see the exact opposite manifest in our lives. despite the fact that Christ continually promises something completely different.

And it breaks my heart. because it causes me to question the heart of God.

I say all of this because despite my emotions ....despite my desire to scream and shout WHY to the heavens, I am choosing to believe. I'm forcing myself to hold on for just a little while longer. I'm needing to be faithful in pressing in for that. in believing that He could and may intervene at any point...

On January 5th, the Lord whispered something to my heart over and over again throughout the day: "Three weeks." And in my spirit, I felt I was to expect something to change, to happen in the next three week time span.

Even now, my saying that...my writing it for the world to see... Man, it scares me. and drives me to exhausted tears.

Because part of me says, "God I can't do this anymore. I can't put it out there. Only to have you, for whatever reason, decide to hold off for another year. or three. ...And what if I'm totally off? What if I'm hearing something that I want to hear? What then? Or what if your version of an answer doesn't fit what I'm expecting? or something that I'm even able to see in this realm? What then?"

Last Friday, I could feel a battle waging over my mind. over my ability to trust. And all I could do was sit myself down in the middle of the floor, amidst my daughters running around and playing, and pray.

Honestly, my prayer probably consisted of no more than one word: "Lord?" But I laid my heart bare before him. And then got up and walked away, trying to not think about all that weighs on my heart.

The Ugly Facts:

-The day after God whispered three weeks, a policeman came to my door at 7:30AM. Taping a judgement (or whatever they call it) saying that I have to be in court because we haven't paid our hospital bill in full yet (we'd been paying it in small increments...there's $500 left). And while we've been trying to work with the hospital for the last forever, they turned us over to collections. Saying they weren't responsible to handle it anymore.

Okay God. Day One. Not looking so good.

-Then our truck went due for inspection. It needs four new tires. Tires that we cannot at this time (with all that is up in the air) afford to pay. So we're officially becoming a one car family.

Okay God. Day Two. Not looking so good.

-Our laptop starts making horrible sounds. It appears to be dying. I'm wondering if it will last more a few more days.

Um God? Day Three. Still...not looking so good.

-Jet still trying to work with the hospital was finally told that we didn't qualify for any of the assistance they offer. This was after our being told that it looked like we would. This was a major blow.

Okay, God. Day Four. Starting to feel a bit nauseous here.

-Then, I went to the mailbox and pulled out an electric bill that read over $600. Knocked the wind out of me. I honestly don't see how that could possibly be anywhere close to correct. But now the ball is in our court to prove the town is wrong.

Okay, God...it's been five days. And seriously? Not looking so good.

-Then Days 6 and 7 are girls were sick. And today (Day 8)...our septic system has obviously begun to get backed up. overflowing into a corner of our yard. This has happened before. It's the town's fault. Their issue. They just have never fixed it correctly.

So as all this twirls around in my head, I struggle. Trying to keep my emotions at bay. to keep my heart in the right attitude before God. to just remain in a place where I'm not completely undone.

And the Lord gently spoke, "Can you hold on for three more weeks?"

I called Jet, crying. Telling him what I felt the Lord said. Exposing the part of my heart that says, "What if three weeks come and goes and nothing concrete has changed? What then?"

...

And there you have it. Christin Unplugged. Raw. Exposed. and completely Vulnerable before the Throne of Heaven. and the judgement of readers.

Here I am. NOT standing in victory over this territory. honestly a little annoyed that I'm still having to fight this battle, holding onto promises that feel like a slap in my face. and way past tired and emotionally drained.

Yet. I hold on. for at least three more weeks. Choosing to trust. Choosing to believe, despite present realities, that He will intervene. that He will move in a way that turns present circumstances into something He foretold.

I document because I want to share "The whole truth. and nothing but the truth."

I document because I'm expecting the ending to be better than its beginning. And what's a miracle story if you don't know the downside? Nothing but a convenient praise of the Lord made public only after the hard part has been walked through.

I want to publicly worship him even though the hard part is all I currently know.

I choose to worship him. Because He's God. I'm not. and it's all I have to offer: My choice. My lack. My weakness.

My Sweet Selah

This little lady's mind is always working

...even when she's not saying anything.

Tonight I was in a rush.

I wanted to put my daughters in the bed. have them quickly brush their teeth, get dressed in their footie pajamas and go straight to sleep.

I wanted my downtime. But Selah didn't want to be quiet; she wanted to chat.

Admittedly, most nights I'm so ready for some time with Jet...or to myself...that I don't stay and let the girls just talk. But for whatever reason, this particular night, I did.

And I'm so so thankful. Not only was it a sweet time for me as a parent, but it also gave me a little insider's view into the Hand of God on my sweet Selah's life.

Selah: Sometimes I pray for yours and Daddy's friends. Like sometimes I pray for Aaron.

... she pauses as if she's trying to think of their last name...

Me: "Gabi's daddy?"

Selah: Yeah...Gabbi's daddy. Sometimes I pray for him. Who's friend is he?

Me: Mommy's and Daddy's. What do you pray?

Selah: I don't know. Just whatever I feel.


I sit in stunned silence for a minute before gushing over how proud I am.

Me: Does God tell you what to pray?

Selah: No...I just pray what I feel.

Me: "Well that is sometimes the way that God speaks to us. by giving us a "feeling"

... continued gushing of how proud I am.

Selah: Well I only do it sometimes...

And with that, the moment faded away. never to be retrieved again. like so many of the fleeting moments we have with our kids, huh?

I can't relay how precious this whole thing was to me. First, knowing that she's been doing this. interceding for people on her own. inspired by God.

AND that she wanted to share it with me!

AND that she wanted to clarify that it wasn't an all the time thing. Even though she could see that her doing it made me proud, she didn't want to give me a faulty view of the frequency. That showed such integrity!

I'm so so blessed by this little girl. by her relationship with Jesus. and her obvious heart for others. and I had to document this small moment in time.

Breaking down the wall

A month into this "Year Of Favor" and I can already see what a weak prayer warrior I'm turning out to be.

Alright, Lord. I'm so not seeing your favor. If anything, there are some arenas where we're seeing the exact opposite. Specific areas that you have challenged me to believe you for. What gives?

I hate to say it, but I'm about done, Lord. Enough of this dedicated prayer. I've given you more than ample time to answer. I mean, hello! It's already been a 47 days. And last I checked, it only took you 7 to create everything I see. So uh, couldn't you work like that again? quick. swift. and complete!

I'm thinking if you're not going to do your part, I'm more than willing to not do mine. because honestly, I'm tired of asking. I'm tired of walking this faith walk. It can be exhausting, you know. And what if you don't want to breakthrough for me anyway? Then it's all a waste of time. who knows, maybe I'm even annoying you with my requests.

Yes, I realize this mindset stinks. In fact, I'd say that's an understatement. And while I don't reside in that hopeless state, it's honestly where my heart has ventured from time to time. going from feeling a complete peace in approaching the Throne of God to struggling with guilt and greed for even daring to draw near.

The mind is the hardest battle to war, I'm convinced of it.

Well...this week has been one where I haven't wanted to press through. I'm just tired. emotionally, spiritually, and most definitely physically (with Alana not sleeping well due to a cold). To top it off, I haven't really heard the Lord say anything. Not that I've given him a whole lot of "down" time to speak. *sigh*

But then

I had this conversation with my 4 year old this morning. And through my own words, the Lord spoke encouragement to my own heart. and *Life* to my resolve in pressing in and believing the Lord for what he has promised me and my family during the next season. regardless of what I'm currently seeing.

Selah: Why do you wear glasses?

Me: So I can see better. We should pray and ask Jesus to heal my eyes.

Selah: We already did that.

Me: Well, sometimes we just have to keep praying.

Selah: Why?

Me: Well...it's like there's a wall in the spirit realm....a wall that we can't see. But it can keep God's promises and his provisions from coming through. So our prayers act as a hammer. pounding away on the wall. causing it to become weaker until finally, it falls down. And then, God's will can come through.

Still Me: You know how when you hit a nail... you don't hit in only once, do you? No. You hit it as many times as you need to in order to get the nail in all the way. Right? Well, that's exactly how it can be with prayers. You just keep praying until you see the results.

As soon as I finished speaking these words to my daughter, I immediately felt the Lord say something to the extent of "Uh-huh. Now that's what I'm talkin' 'bout!"

Yep. He speaks something akin to inner city gangsta talk when addressing me. We be tight like dat. *grin*

And just like that, I knew he wasn't annoyed. neither by my asking nor my difficulty in coming to a place of solid Faith Footing.

And suddenly my plans of leisure for tonight change. For Jet and I will be pressing in as a couple. Taking out our Prayer Hammers and beating the snot out of that wall.

You know, in keeping with the gangsta talk and all.

Yesterday a random question flew through my mind:

"If you could wish any three things for your children, what would they be?"

And then like the scene from Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade, I heard a small addendum run through my brain:

"Choose wisely."

It was that last part that really got me thinking...

In the Disney movie, Aladdin, he wishes for fame and fortune. Just like every other movie character when a genie, lamp, and three wishes are involved. For it's the immediate need...the biggest desire...the grandest luxury that one goes after in that moment.

But as I carefully weighed my thoughts, making sure to "choose wisely", these are not the things that came to mind. As I begin to truly search my heart concerning my hopes for my children's lives, thankfully, I found myself hoping for more than mere conveniences.

I thought of long, fulfilled lives. Where passion for Jesus, their spouses, and their faith was rock solid. unshakable. contagious.

There was more that I considered. Hopes that hit my heart in rapid speed. But then my thoughts were interrupted...the little ones, whose very lives I was pondering, called out. They needed me. in the now.

But today the whole thing came rushing back. and something occurred to me.

Those things can be prayed for.

I know, I know. It's a "duh" statement. But it hit me hard. Because when the random thought of "wishes" ran through my head...I really considered it, you know? I took time to actually think about it.

But how often do I just sit around and think about the things that I can devote my life praying for concerning my girls?! How often do I get excited thinking about the weight and influence that my prayers can have on the rest of their lives?!

So today I am asking myself. What ARE my hopes for them? And how can I back those desires with daily, fervent, committed prayer?

Princess Today. Queen Tomorrow.

One morning not too long ago, through a small fluke of misplanning and miscommunication, the girls and I found ourselves ready to leave the house...with suddenly no where to go.

Even all of our back-up plans were fast being eliminated: Our library didn't open until noon, and it was nine. I couldn't foresee a trip to the park with Raegan because she'd been fussy/teething. Not to mention, it was very muggy. And I didn't want to just call a friend up and say "Uh. I'm dropping by. In five minutes." Because my girls were wanting something special. Not rushed.

So as my girls stood anxiously by the door, packed and ready to leave...I call up my mom. Ah, these are the moments that I love having my family so close by. (Yes, there are other moments, Mom. This just was one of them). Off to Grandma's house we go. The girls were thrilled! ;)

During the drive, I started to pray for two married friends of mine. And I loved it! I don't get very much time to just pray "by myself". To hear the sound of my voice as I cry out to God. Yes, the girls were in the backseat, but they were busy making up songs about Jesus. Loud ones. So...it felt like alone time. Me in the front seat. By myself. Praying outloud for friends. And suddenly, my prayers shifted. I began to lift up the future husbands of my little girls.

I can't explain it, but something in me "clicked". Yes, I've always known that these little girls would soon grow up...

...would soon be at the very doorstep of the Life Seasons that don't feel that far behind me: boys, sports, clothes, dances...Getting dressed up for real.

But for some reason, that far-off fact simply hit home in my heart. It became reality to me as I drove down the road praying for little boys. Unknown to me now but still very much alive. Out there, preparing to become the men that would love my daughters.

I prayed for my girls' confidence levels. That they would be girls who wouldn't have to share bits and pieces of their heart to just anybody in order to feel important. That they would be drawn to the idea of holding out for one man. And that the little boys out there would have a deep conviction, even at a young age, to wait for the time when they would meet and marry my little girls.

On and on I prayed. As thoughts and feelings rushed my heart, I handed them over to God to store up until the perfect time.

And I realized something. I love being the one that gets to watch them grow up. Yes, I already knew that. But it was as if every desire to do something else outside of the home vanished. *like that*

I want to dedicate my life to ensuring that my little girls DO have a rock solid foundation of self-esteem. I want to be their Mom. Nothing more. Nothing less. Yes, I want to be Jet's wife. That's a given....he a part of me. But it's... different. I can't explain it. If you're a parent, I don't have to. All I can say is I want to dedicate my life to deepening. expanding. strengthening the lives and hearts of my little girls.

People sometimes ask me what I do for a living. And then, they add on the "Or are you just a mom?" Yeah. But I am ever-so-content at "just" being a mom.

In Sickness and in Health

A week ago was really rough; Selah was extremely sick. To the point that we were "this close" to taking her to the ER because she was unresponsive. Scared me to death. But one morning, she just woke up a completely different child. She even said, "My tummy says I'm hungry!" Made me smile.

It's times like these, times when my children experience pain and sickness, that I am so thankful that they are usually very healthy. I cannot fathom those parents that live day in and day out at the foot of a hospital bed. Or trying to talk their child into doing one more blood test. Or watching their child's hair fall out due to chemo. Just watching those info-mercials on St.Jude's Hospital patients brings me to tears. I can't imagine LIVING it.

I have a fierce faith in the Almighty. I've experienced him on a very personal level. I KNOW he is real. I KNOW he loves and heals. I've seen it with my own eyes. But when I hear about those children who suffer endlessly, there's a question that burns in my heart. Yet it remains on the outskirts of my mind because I'm not sure I want to ask it. I'm not sure I want to acknowledge that it's there, to have my voice breathe life into the doubts that linger behind it. But regardless of my outward acknowledgement, the question remains. Why, Lord? Why do you, seemingly, stand by and do nothing?

I know, this is a question that is asked around the world: If God is a loving God then why...? And I won't even pretend to have answers. There's no way that I can understand ALL the intricasies of the Lord's mind and purposes. But *lightbulb goes off* I DO understand the power of prayer. A gift that God has given us...to UTILIZE...to EMBRACE.

Yes Lord, you could intervene. You could snap your fingers and *bam* things would be fixed. But for some strangely profound reason you've left a lot of the power in your children's hands: the Church and their prayers. So Lord, give me the words, the fearlessness, the tenacity, the...whatever-it-takes to get over myself enough to trust you and pray for the sick. Boldly.

And I definitely don't just mean in church. I mean in places like WalMart...when I see a man in a wheelchair. Or in Costco when I watch a teenage boy holding his mother's hand because he is blind. Your Word says "Lay your hands on the sick and they will recover." So maybe the answer to some of the whys of all this senseless suffering is that we, the church, have our hands behind our back?

Refusing to reach out. Remaining inactive. Resting in personal comfort.

With everything in me, I don't want to be like that. Empower me Lord...to move outside of my comfort zone. So that you will be glorified. So that your healing will breakforth in this day.

Bottom line: I have a powerfully deep love for my children. I love them like words cannot capture. So if I love my children like that when I am completely void of unconditional love outside of Christ, how much more does Jesus love those sick children!? I mean, If my children were sick or dying, I would do anything to make sure they got better. So I can only assume that He feels the same way, times 1000.

Lord... I know you are all about love and healing. Enable me to see with your eyes and empower me to BE your hands. The ones that reach out, that comfort, that heal. Because I have to admit, I am heartbroken when I see a child suffer. And because of that, I believe that you've already given me your heart.