Do you want to play with me...?

Learning to give and receive love isn't always the easiest thing.


See the girl in the tie-dyed dress? Her name is Hannah. and she's the friend that Selah fought to gain, Saturday July 3rd, 2010...

Over July 4th weekend, Jet and I loaded up the girlies to go camping with Jet's extended family.

When I say extended, I'm talking well over 100+ people here! It was unexpectedly FABULOUS and will be shared on this blog. One day.... When I finally shake hands with Spare Time.

But for now, I'm just introducing the point to say that Selah was overwhelmed with the amount of children there. We're talking dozens and dozens of cousins, to one degree or another... yet strangers all the same.

Whereas her other sisters tend to be more outgoing...

(Raegan just walks up to little girls she doesn't know and makes herself right at home)


Selah, at this stage of her development, leans more towards the shy end of the spectrum.


And so...

She felt left out for the first little while, assuring herself that people didn't want to play with her and obviously weren't pursuing her for a friendship because they didn't like her. or at the very least, liked other children more.

(she stayed near to her sisters and 1st cousins during the first day)

As a mother, it was heartbreaking to see. Like you other parents know, watching your child hurt is nothing short of experiencing that hurt for yourself.

On several occasions, she and I had to go off by ourselves, as I'd listen to her heart and gently try to encourage her to see beyond the hurt feelings.


It's a hard thing to see beyond yourself when speaking on matters of the heart and hurt, isn't it?

But I know, from experience, it's one of the most important lessons a young girl needs to learn early on: the ability to not get caught up in the drama of your emotions.

for the heart is a wild member. with a imaginative mind and strong will all its own. A Destructive Duo unless aptly trained.

And so, I "trained.

Some of the time, I came away feeling like I hit the nail on the head, that what I said was nothing short of Heaven interacting with Selah through me. Other times, I felt I stayed way on the other side of Inspiring.

But, in truth, I kind of doubt ANY of what I said, whether noteworthy or not, will be remembered. The words weren't what she needed. It was the perspective.


(she did play with others and others did play with her. but in her heart, she wasn't seeing it that way)

...
And on the second day of camping, I saw Hannah. She had just arrived with her family and, by divine intervention, was yet to start interacting with the mass of children. sort of hanging around her van, watching the others from the fringe.

I called Selah over, as she was now playing comfortably with some of the other children.



Though still a bit reserved, you could tell that she was starting to feel more a part of the camaraderie.

" Do you see that girl? She looks like she really wants to play with someone, doesn't she?"

Selah looks at me and smiles her amazing smile.



"Part of wanting a friend is being one. Part of making friendships is pursuing them, being the one to go up and do the inviting. So why don't YOU go up to her and ask if she wants to play with you? This your chance to make someone else feel included."

She looks excited, but apprehensive.

I could tell she wanted to go to Hannah, yet was being held back. most likely by that stinkin' voice in our head that causes us to doubt our ability to be desirable.

"Do you want me to go with you?"

She beams and shakes her head, but then turns to me and says, "But I don't know what to say."

"Just tell her your name and ask if she wants to play."

Why we make relating to people so complicated, I'll never know. Yet, don't we all do it from time to time, don't we? God deliver us from ourselves, as I dare say I get in my way more than others at times.

With me trailing behind her, she raced ahead. I couldn't hear what she said as she approached Hannah, but I'm guessing it was quiet and under her breath because Hannah looked at me for clarity.

As so I became a part of the conversation as naturally and quietly as I could, not wanting to overshadow Selah or be the mom who always has to step in and take charge. Yet, recognizing that this interaction was going to set the foundation for later friendship-pursuing-moments.

I figured it was best for Selah to have a happy outcome than a totally independent conversation.

And as I walked away from the sandbox, leaving the two of them smiling and playing together, I couldn't help but to smile to myself. Sweet victory! It doesn't always come with bells and whistles. Sometimes it comes in the form of inconspicuous winks between mother and daughter.

Though it wasn't a big moment as far as others watching might say, I knew it was pivotal in the heart of my little girl.

Because in her heart, she fought a battle and won. overcame her fear of rejection. and introduced herself to a little girl named Hannah.

It's the little moments that can pass us by.

Usually when I go MIA in Blogdom, it's not because there's nothing to say; but rather because there's too much to say to even know where or how to begin. These last few months have been no exception.

I feel like the Gates of Heaven have literally been opened over our home. It's been that intense. that revelatory. that sweet.

Relationships have been shifted and priorities renewed. Life has been overflowing, on so many realms. And I've had three very sweet distractions that have kept me from writing: My God. My husband. and My daughters.

And this post...well, this one is about the "My Daughters" part.

--------------------------
Seasons come and go. There's no doubt or debate on that subject.

But one thing... a truth independent of emotions or trends or busy schedules, will always remain...

I will forever be The Mom to these amazing little girls.

Therefore, I've been spending any free time I have these past days months not writing blogs or documenting life, but rather living it.

side by side with these little ladies.


as well as this one. :)


who is currently too little to sit on the swing with the others eating Icees.


Though allow me to assure you, she has four more-than-willing older sisters who'd LOVE to volunteer their baby-cradling-expertise.


*This is me prying fat, sticky fingers from a rather-strong choke hold around Raquel's neck*

Um, no thank you, honey. Let. Mommy. have. her.

(Notice that she didn't seem to mind sisterly-lovin' via Choke Hold.)

Anyway, what was I saying? Uh...spending time? focusing?...focusing on....what? Oh yeah...my girls! All five of them.

Sorry. I get distracted when I look at sweet baby cheeks.


These last months, I've been spending time with these guys. in such a way that I'm getting to know the ins and outs of who they are.

as real people.


with real feelings.


and real thoughts.


and real dislikes.


and real senses of humor.


all independent and different from my own.

And that takes time, you know? At least for me, it's required a ginormous amount of intentionality and dedication to really listen and enjoy them as individual people and not just see them as a mass of children cohabitating with me:

• to really pay attention when they're telling me something, instead of just nodding indifferently while I continue to research something online.
  
  
• to allow them to help with dinner prep even when I know their "help" involves a huge mess and a large amount of extra time.
  
  
• to spend quality time with Charis and Selah once the three youngest are napping, even though there are days where I want nothing more than to ignore all the conversational needs of people under 4 feet tall.
  
  
• to spend an extra 10 minutes one-on-one with them before naptime, instead of saying a half-hearted 'Night-night' from the hallway.
  
  
• to schedule date nights with the oldest three.
  
  
• to play that obnoxious lovely little game that holds absolutely no interest to me. just because I know they love it.
  

Being a mom to lots of young children can be draining. It requires a copious amount of chocolate patience as well as the ability to intelligently function on sporadic spurts of sleep.

But it also gives me a last ditch effort at being spontaneous and young again. ...I have to remind my Old Self of this from time to time. You know, being that Old Self tends to be boring. focusing on bills and housework and menus.



I totally admit it. Hi, my name is Christin and I get wrapped up in things that don't matter.

We all know the drill, right? Our Distracted Self takes over...and demands to live a life not meant to be ours in this season. Which then gives rise to Ungrateful Self who monopolizes all thought, moaning over What Will Never Be and becoming bitter over What Is.

It's a lovely little cycle I like to call SIN.

And so, these past few months, I've been making it my focus to put to death both Distraction and Ungratefulness. For they've been robbing me of THE most precious gifts this side of heaven.

My family.



It's crazy, but sometimes it's so easy to lose sight of the preciousness of what we see on a daily basis, isn't it?

Take my engagement ring, for example. It's gorgeous. But because I see it on my hand every day, I can easily forget to admire it. to cherish it.

Same with my hub and girls. I see them every. single. day. So, if I'm not careful, they can become less valuable in my eyes. giving me the open door to esteem someone (or something) else more highly for novelty-sake.

Tragic.


SO. That said, I've been taking the time to reallllly listen and spend quality moments together with my girls. Pushing through that stinkin' built-in temptation that seems to come along side the choice to remain at home with the kiddos.

Or is it just me?

Pathetic Moment. Take #10,984 #1:

• "But YOU get to actually talk with ADULTS during the day!" (This said to my husband when I'm pouting about how my life is soooo horrible. Cue violins.)
  
  
• "Don't ask me what I do all day. Because I couldn't tell you, though I know it most likely had something to do with wiping some body part. and putting away that same stinkin' 100,000 piece puzzle someone insisted on giving them."
  
  (Insert adult woman dramatically throwing herself, face-down, onto the bed in a moment of glorified self-pity)
  

Ahem. *straightening my shirt and checking my hair in the mirror* That was awkward, now wasn't it?

*clearing throat* Moving on.


Anyway. Those moments...they're the ones that I've been pushing through. determined to see my way to the other side. ;)

In the midst of this self-inflicted Mom Overhaul, I felt the Lord remind me of a conversation I had with someone a while back, where she said: "I need to work outside of the home because being away from them helps me to be a better mother."

*sigh*

Don't get me wrong. Clearly, I understand the heart behind that. Because *hello* I've found myself thinking along those lines before (This is where I refer you to the above examples of Confessions of a Stressed out Mom).

What mom doesn't want to get away from time to time?!!


Heck, I'll just go ahead and confess right now: I've literally called up my husband and said, "That's it. I'm leaving the kids and driving ...somewhere."

(Though I never would do this, obviously the tone is my voice was convincing as Jet found it necessary to inform me that this just wasn't a viable option. Ha!)


So yeah. I get it. But that's why that statement struck me as so sad...because it sounds so logical... wise, even. Have lots of time away from children = Ability to enjoy children.

But think about it. That's essentially saying: in order to have the emotional energy to like our kids, we have to limit the amounts of time spent with them.


Kind of sad when put that way, isn't it?

Again, don't get me wrong. I GET IT. I know how draining children can be. After all, I live with five of my very own.

But this past season, I've felt a new resolve to NOT allow my heart to wander to that place. to not be deceived into that way of thinking. but to allow God to turn my heart.

He will change parents' attitudes toward their children and children's attitudes toward their parents. If not, I will come and reclaim my land by destroying you." Malachi 4:6

And I can tell you one thing...He has. Seriously, there's unavoidable difference in the way I view my daughters.




I've been learning. changing. and discovering that Mothering doesn't have to be draining. it can be life-giving. if I allow it.

And yes, I've always known this...and experienced it to a degree...but it's like there's been a massive shift in the atmosphere of my heart. And I'm so grateful.


especially when those moments of Intentional Mothering lead to Little Girl climbing in my lap to whisper, "I love you so soooo much, Mommy!"

*le sigh*



So my life, while its been MIA in Blogdom, has been more than full in REAL LIFE, as I've been deepening the relationships I have with these five little girls.


who just happen to be daughters.

(Note: this post took a culmination of weeksssss to write. as it felt slightly inappropriate informing my girls, "I'm sorry, but I can't play right now as I'm writing about how much attention I'm giving you." Ha!)

Do they even make record players anymore?

Some things I saved from my childhood must've accidentally been thrown in with the girls' books during Mass Exodus of Attic. because this morning Charis brought these down for closer inspection.



Selah: "WOAH! Those are huge CDs!"

Me: They're records. For a record player.

Selah: "A WHAT player?"

Ah yes, wrinkle creams got nothin' on holding back the years when children's uncensored comments are to be had.

These are the days...

These are days that, if I'm not careful, I find myself wishing them away. Anything to just get to the end of the evening when I can put them in bed, flop on the couch, and have "me time".

Picture taken March 2010: Alana (18 mo), Charis (7yrs), Raegan (newly 3 yrs), Selah (5.5yrs), Raquel (3mo)

These are days that I'm sure, later in life, I'll be wishing them back again. Anything to just turn back time and have the opportunity to snuggle with the little version of them just one. more. time.

The things that make up 95% of my daily schedule this month will be forgotten by this time next year mid summer. Because life is moving fast, and my girls are literally growing up over night.

And I'm just feeling the need to remind myself again and again and again that I cannot emotionally live in a constant state of "One Day..."

• One day, they'll all be potty trained.
• One day, we won't have to use baby gates
• One day, I won't have to work my schedule around naptimes.
• One day, our car won't be crammed with five carseats.
• One day...

Or I'll miss out on Today.

I want to soak in every little bit of their quirks and budding personalities and sense of humor and current challenges. All things that can easily go unnoticed and/or "unremembered" if I'm not intentional in taking note.

So that's what I'm going to do: Take Note. Document for my sake as well as their own, so that one day we can look back and remember...

Charis (7 years 7 months)

This sweet little thing is every parents dream. She's (one of) my compliant child. wanting to always do what she thinks will please you. never wanting to make a mistake...

She wants, with everything in her, to do things "right". And I struggle with this...the knowing how to balance correcting her with encouraging her. Because I know how hard she can be on herself. So she definitely doesn't need to feel like I'm always on the sidelines wanting to pounce on her every mistake.

(this is where my NewYear's resolution to not micromanage comes into play!)

I'm praying about how to encourage her to take chances and to break out of the mindset of perfectionism. because that is something that will cripple and suffocate the joy right of life if not dealt with in a healthy way, early on.

When she was little (18months +), while most little children were getting pleasure in knocking down a stack of blocks, she did not. She wanted to build it and got upset if it fell down. So in the spirit of kicking Perfectionism to the curb, I had to start knocking down the block towers myself...and then cheering like a crazed monkey.

It took a while for her to catch on, but eventually she did...laughing with me when our blocks would fall. If only the rest of the "perfectionism issues" were as easy as clapping over fallen blocks.

-She's already a "little mommy" and definitely a HUGE help to me!! During the first few weeks of Raquel's life, she was my right-hand woman, especially when Alana would cry in frustration because she didn't want me to hold Raquel instead of her.

During those moments when nature proves that I am, in deed, lacking in my multitasking capabilities, Charis was always willing to step it up and do whatever I asked of her. whether that was holding Raquel for a minute, getting a diaper, or helping Raegan go to the potty.

And even though that trait blesses me to no end, I'm determined to find ways to make her feel special APART from being the 'big sister', you know? I DO NOT want her confidence to be hinged on her ability to please others. I DO NOT want her to feel like my life would fall apart if she didn't step it up and hold it together. With everything in me, before God, I am determined to make sure that she does NOT grow up feeling like her role in life is to make everyone else's life easier.

Do all parenting issues feel like we're walking an itty bitty tightrope? a little too much of this or a bit too little of that and *bam* you hit concrete. God, give me wisdom.


-A few months ago, Raquel had some breathing issues. Ones that required us to take her to the ER to see an neonatologist. which meant that we had to cancel a Date Night that Charis and I had planned.

Charis was obviously annoyed that we were having to postpone her plans when I told her we were taking Raquel to the hospital. I looked at her, slightly annoyed myself, and said, "Charis! Raquel isn't breathing right. If she stops breathing, she could DIE."

Without skipping a beat and without changing the look on her face, she casually said, "Oh. Okay. Well, that's important too." :)


March 27th, she lost her first tooth, while brushing her teeth, after spending the night at Grandma and Granddaddy's house.

Being that she's the last of her friends to lose her first tooth, she was starting to wonder if she'd ever have any loose teeth. ;)

-She's into everything Kitchen:
writing recipes.
wanting to cook 'by herself'.
wearing aprons
playing money and restaurant games with her kitchen playset

She's even asking for a cooking set (as in the REAL thing) for her birthday.

Chances are if I'm in the kitchen cooking/baking, she's underfoot, asking begging to help. And while I let her help and make food whenever I can, I want to be even better about entrusting her with culinary things. despite the fact that it'll inevitably slow the process down.


-Just recently, she decided that she wanted to be a doctor. In addition to being a Professional Princess, of course.

When I asked her what kind of doctor...she asked what I meant. So I told her there were all different types: pediatrics, dentistry, ENTs, heart surgeons, brain specialists...

She wanted to look into "the brain one". Until I showed her a you*tube video of an actual brain surgery. With tears in her compassionate heart (because after all, it was some poor person's brain that they were working on), she said that she didn't know what type of doctor she wanted to be...

Just not the brain one. Ha!


-She's a very logical thinker, that one. And a very literal as well, as I'm constantly having to explain jokes to her...though, I do have to say, she's gotten a LOT quicker, more savvy in the whole joke department in the last month.

-She continues to be like a sponge when it comes to anything intellectual. In fact, she's constantly teaching me things that she learns during her nightly reading.

-She tends to be a little timid when trying new things. That said, I'm SOO proud of her as she recently joined a track club. Her first time racing getting 2nd place in the 60m AND 2nd place in the 100m sprints. WAHOOOO

though I have to say her athletic abilities are beginning to surprise me. I've just recently started JillianMicheal's 30 day Shred video. And while one level (20 minutes of INTENSE workout) is enough for me. She, my crazy 7 year old, does all three back to back.

Which means that she does sixty minutes of increasingly intense workouts. Um yeah, you're only supposed to do one level at a time. She does all three, breaks into a total sweat, but then does more. Aw, my little glutton for (exercise) punishment. :)

SELAH (5 years 8 months)

Selah (5) singing in the spring play

This little one continues to be a Snuggle Bug. a deep thinker. an intense feeler.

-She fiercely loves her sisters...to the point that I have to repeated tell her to not kiss her sisters if she's sick. She's that into snuggling and loving on her family. In fact, whenever she's with Raquel, she'll lock her jaw real hard, squeeze her hands into fists, deepen her voice, and say, "I just want to squeeze her!" ha!

-She's always wanting to make someone happy if they're crying. And while I really love this desire to bring joy to others, I, again, just want to make sure that she doesn't get into the train of thought that her life's purpose is to focus on making others happy. But God bless her, she's just so genuinely sweet, and hates to see others sad or lonely.

Like when I asked her who she wanted to call one day, she said, "Nana."

I thought it soo sweet that she was thinking about her and the fact that she was probably feeling lonely living alone. But that's just like her, sincerely sweet through and through.

When the time came for her to try out for the spring play/musical at church, she was all over it. At least where the singing was concerned. She had no fear, no hesitation, no thought that she couldn't do it and do it well. (though she didn't want to have a speaking part to begin with, but did reallly well with it in the end! Atta girl!)

We've recently been talking about approaching life with the confidence that you can do it. that all throughout life, we're going to have to try new things, and if we go into the situation thinking that we can't...most likely we'll do just that, fail. But if we approach a situation believing that with God we CAN do anything, then, chances are...we will.

Am I teaching my daughters that they'll never fail? No. But I am challenging them to believe in themselves instead of taking the view that if they've never tried something, then they won't be any good at it.

Whenever the opportunity for a deep talk happens, it's Selah that sits there and soaks it in. She gets this half-grin on her face, like she's getting to hear a secret meant only for important adults. But what blesses my heart is that she usually (immediately!) changes her attitude/actions/thinking. In fact, I'm ALWAYS amazed at how interested and influenced she is by our talks.

Of course, I shouldn't be surprised...her name does mean "pause and reflect on what the Lord has done." And she is definitely into thinking about life.

In fact, at least a few times every week, she's talking about what her life will be like when she has a family. how she wants to teach her children the things that I'm teaching them. how she's going to make a certain dinner for her kids. or keep a certain toy for them. She's definitely a forward-thinker and gets that life isn't all about the immediacy of today.


She has such a desire to know Jesus, especially his voice. Whenever I tell her something that the Lord has told me, she gets teary-eyed. Because she yet to hear his voice in a recognizable way. (doesn't that just melt your heart???)

Because of this girl and her questions and desire for the deeper things in life, I have multiple open doors to discuss things with my daughters that most wouldn't be talking about until the teens years. But I so love that about her!

I'm thinking her love language is touch because she's daily asking if she can snuggle with us. I'm constantly finding little love notes to me, asking if we can spend time together and snuggle. Even after she's been disciplined and is crying, she wants to sit on our lap and just hug. I love that about her, that she doesn't close off her spirit after being corrected.

Her heart is soooo tender....crying if she's disappointed Jet or me...or been misunderstood... or accidentally hurt one of her sisters.

Selah...always so photogenic, regardless of what else is going on. :) She is my sweet sweet SelahGirl. And I cannot imagine life without her.


RAEGAN (3 years)

A few months ago, Raegan turned 3. and God bless her heart, we were all sick. Yet, she didn't complain. Not Once! She just focused on the fact that she got to have cake (that she threw up) and a few balloons, which she shared with her older sisters.

Can you say TROOPER!?

I am continually amazed at this little girl. A girl (16months-ish) that used to attack her sisters out of frustration of being the littlest (ie. left out). But since the birth of Alana, she has matured into this big girl (I'm not allowed to call her "little") that won't even retaliate when little sisters pull her hair (out!) or grab away toys.

Already she has a tender heart towards the Lord, wanting to pray for people's healing...reminding everyone to pray before meals...asking honest, simple questions about the heart of God. Like yesterday.

As I was leaving her room after tucking her in for her nap, I stopped and walked back to spend a few more minutes with her. Completely overwhelmed, I just started telling her how much I love her. How I love her eyes. her nose. her tummy. her toes.

At some point, I told her how much God loved her. And she stopped, looked up at me, and said, "But why?" My first reaction was "Man, this little girl is sooo much like me." (Jet tells me he love me and in my deeper moments I ask this same question. Not because I don't believe him, but just because I want to know what he's thinking when he says that.)

So we talked about the reasons why God loves her. Each time, I'd try and answer on an increasingly deeper level, but each time she'd ask again "But WHY does he love me?" Finally, I got to the place where I told her that even when she makes mistakes and does bad things, he STILL loves her.

She laughed and asked, "He does??!!" It was such a precious moment to be there when she first grasped that concept, at such a young age (just barely 3).

Yet. Despite her intense sweetness and irresistible charm, she knows when and where to draw boundaries....

Where: Public library. Children's floor, in front of the snoopy house that all the elementary-aged kids want to be in.

The Antagonist: A rather large (in both height and...*cough cough* stature) little girl playing the part of territorial bully, obviously having issues with the fact that Charis and Selah were inside Snoopy House. and she was not.

The Situation: Charis and Selah were just smiling at Massive Bully, essentially ignoring her. (or were they just not cluing in to the fact that they were being picked on?) while Mommy practiced extreme levels of self-control by not going over and giving that bully a little lesson in Momma Don't Play That.

The Heroine: In walks 2 year old from stage right. Without hesitation or the slightest bit of intimidation, she makes a bee-line to Bully Girl. Points her finger in her face (which essentially meant that Raegan's arm was at a 45 degree angle), and said, "You stop dat!"

And then she calmly walked away, leaving Bully completely speechless. Raegan wasn't being malicious. She had no interest in fighting. She just wanted to be clear, "You are messing with my girls and that just isn't permitted on my watch."

I have to tell you, whatever self control I had been practicing up to that point...you know, to not put that little tyrant in her place... was nothing to the self control I had to muster in order to remain seated and calm. because I so wanted to give Raegan a standing ovation,with a loud, "You go girl!!" ;)

She's the perfect mix of sweet and sassy. I have a feeling "leader" in somewhere in her future calling. In fact, I'm thinking Charis and Selah will learn how to be more assertive by watching their little sister. :)

-She cracks me up with the way she talks sooo grown up. to the extent that I SO wish I could capture it all. But there's just no way to bottle up the essence of "Raegan" into words. She's hysterical and innocently assertive well beyond her years.

-For some weird reason, she's into asking "What time is it?" And then regardless of what time you tell her, she says, "That means it's nine o'clock!" Uh...? No. but she won't be swayed that every hour of the day does not equal her golden 9:00 hour.


Alana (20 months)

This little girl is the life of the party.


Regardless of whether she has a known audience or not, she's hamming it up...making hilarious faces in the corner just to amuse herself. If she then catches you watching her, she bursts into laughter.

She loves to sing. It doesn't matter if it's her ABCs, Old McDonald, or the song her daddy wrote for her (all the girls have a "daddy song" that is sung to them every night before they go to bed)...she just loves to sing.

I rarely know where my cell phone is, due to her uncanny ability to retrieve it from all manner of heights...and then hide it. Though I don't think she's intending to hide it, she's just highly distractable. So when she sees something more entertaining, cell phone gets dropped on sight.

Praise be the God that her cell phone escapades haven't included the toilet bowl. Yet. She did go through a phase where she discovered the toilet...and the water that lurks within. I'll just leave it at that, being that the thought makes me involuntarily heave.

She LOVES talking on phone (and has for a LONG time) and will routinely hand it to me, saying "Ma-ma" (Grandma). She's always had this special love for my mom, asking for her on a daily (sometimes hourly) basis. My mom, of course, loves this. :)

Thankfully, at 20 months, she still naps two times a day. *Sweet bliss*


I just want to squeeze that face. Gently, of course.


Everything ends up in her mouth. pencil erasers. rocks. markers. bubbles.

I told Jet today that it's a wonder she has never choked. I've gotten to the point where I'm just having to trust that God has got her protected because, seriously, I think the girl likes to try her (my) limits.


She LOVES her sisters...especially Raegan and "Baby 'Quel".


But because Raquel has a thing for grabbing hair...


Lani's interactions with Raquel can go from this...

to this in 2.2 seconds.


She loves Raquel sooo much that she leaned in to kiss her face. *insert heartbroken sobs over having her offer of love being met in a firm yank of hair*



I'm so completely blessed to have daughters that truly love each other, when I know that siblings can fight nonstop. So yeah, I don't take that for granted on any level. Even some of our neighbors tell us how they love watching them play together. ;)

-Alana calls cheese "izza!" Can you tell what we ate a lot of right after Raquel was born? You know, being that she connects cheese to pizza. ha!


-She's very into doing things herself. completely refusing to eat food unless she is the one using the fork or spoon.

-I have never, as in EVER, seen a child more in-love with shoes than this girl! Once Jet was trying to get her to come back into her room. Laughing, she hightailed it in the opposite direction. "Lani, come get yours shoes on." She LITERALLY stopped in her tracks, turned 180degrees, and ran back to him.

Who knew the promise of putting on shoes could bring about such immediate obedience? Nice. :)

If she knows we're leaving the house she runs around saying "I want shoes on! Shoes on!!"

-Her newest thing is to pucker up and come at you, ready to plant some kisses. I'll have to get a picture of that soon. But unfortunately my camera has been lost since Memorial Day. (this is where I fight back tears of frustration)



RAQUEL. (5months)

(picture taken a while back...maybe around 3.5 months?)

more up to date...5 months

-This sweet little lady has been sick for over 6 weeks now (coughing, throwing up mucous, struggling to breath), finally getting diagnosed with pneumonia a while back. All I can say is that she is a trooper!

Thank God she's so laid back because were she prone to scream, she may have had to be hospitalized (screaming=more mucous=less breathing).

If this were a video insert, you'd be hearing her "singing", which in my opinion, somewhat resembles Scuttles squawking on "The Little Mermaid". Love it.

I don't think I realized just how much it was effecting her strength *duh, Mommy!* until after she started to feel better (at 5months). Because almost immediately she started rolling from tummy-to-back and then back-to-tummy.


and then just recently, she's moved on to sitting up.

(Charis has been trying to help her sit up for a little bit now)

She's definitely a sweet, sweet personality. laying in the bed, talking to herself, rolling around...until she falls asleep (at least most days). I'm SO looking forward to watching her personality develop as she grows.


One last thing (that I can think of at the moment)...

She crosses her feet when she sleeps. like her daddy. ;)

I love each stage that my girls go through!! I told Jet last night that I felt like each one of them was in my favorite stage.

• The smushy, chubby stage of babyfat, and cuddles while they nurse.
• The stage where they're starting to grow up and want more independence yet are ever-ready to crawl into your lap and plant messy kisses on your face.
• The stage where you are just able to start having 'big" conversations with them, watching their eyes open in wonder to all around them.
• The stage where they're beginning to learn about themselves and their capabilities.
  
• The stage where they're branching out, apart from you. becoming more and more like the young adult version of themselves.
  

I love them all! And I consider myself WHOLLY BLESSED to have the chance to watch five beautifully sweet girls grow into young women.