Can't believe I did this...AND am owning up to it.

"Are You a Slacker Mom?"

I came across this questionnaire title one night. And I have to admit, I was drawn to it. I wanted to see what questions it would ask. For some odd reason, I wanted to prove myself to not "slack" in the whole motherhood department. To shout to the black hole of cyber space "I AM a good mother. I passed your stupid questionnaire!"

I didn't bother to open it. At least at that point. But the next morning, curiosity got the best of me; I wanted to see what it said. But unable to find where I had first seen it, I googled it. And lo and behold, it's not only a pop-up, lurking on relevant and educational websites...it's its own stinkin' domain!!! http://www.areyouaslackermom.com/

Uh yeah. Serious. Internet web-making people, really...get a hobby.

So I, being the mother with apparently too much time on my hands (and obviously in need of my own hobby), cracked my knuckles, deemed myself worthy of the challenge, and clicked on it. The heading read:

"Every woman has her own parenting style-what's your parenting style? Take this fun quiz to discover if you are a slacker mom, and learn some fun tips on
motherhood."

I thought...hmmm, I'd like to know my style. Who knew motherhood had different styles? Maybe I'll rank "hip" mom. Or maybe "down-to-earth and laid-back". Heck, I'll even settle for "wears-clothes-that-have-style" type Mom. So I settled back into my couch, laptop on my lap, ready for my lesson on mothering styles.

(note: my children were all sleeping at this point and time. I, for the record, was not letting them run loose outside while proving my mothering skills on paper. *grin* AND I knew taking the quiz was ranking pretty low on my list of daily priorities. but hey! I figured, it said it'd be fun...I'm always up for that. AND that I'd learn some mothering tips. So it'd be educational to boot!)

But oh my! The questions stunned me. And not because I was enlightened on the qualities that the Super Mom possesses. But because the questions had N-O-T-H-I-N-G to do with interacting with your child. In fact you could've BEEN a child and still completed the questions. For example! This is the first question:

1) This quiz is for moms, and moms are traditionally female, but just to be
sure, what's your gender?

Are you kidding me?! Who wrote that question?!! The questionnaire goes on to ask about your age, education level, debt amount, other occupations... and on and on. Of course, it does ask how many children you have. I think they even called them "cherubs." THAT should have clued me in that whoever wrote this did not have children.

Yes, I did the entire thing. All 15 irrelevant questions of it! Thinking that maybe, just maybe, I'd get to the part of the questionnaire that actually referred to me interacting with my very own cherubs. :) BUT nope. Never happened.

And at the end of it, there are no accolades of my superior mothering skills. No helpful tips. No scores... no results whatsoever. No! Instead, there's a place for your name and email address. You know, so they can contact you with the results of your nothing-to-do-with-being-a-mom survey. And then *slam* you with all the junk mail that the Internet offers.

Does this speak of how stupid ...or is it naive?.... or maybe just really really lacking in confidence and common sense... people assume moms are?! I mean, the fact that there's an entire website dedicated to assessing slacker moms speaks volumes. (the fact that I was baited in to this whole scenario and then proceeded to take the time to actually visit the biggest waste of Internet space...well, that's a whole other story *laugh*)

BUT then to further insult your intelligence...after answering questions that do NOT, in fact, relate to the whole mother-child relationship...they ask you if you want to become a MEMBER of their "Yes-we-know-you're-an-idiot" Club. Where you can "Share Quiz results" with your friends. What results?! I knew before I took your quiz that I was married, owned a house, a college degree, and one dog. All my friends know this. I don't need you to tell them.

I just wanted you to tell me what style of mother I was. I just wanted to have some fun. I just wanted to get some tips.

And well...just in case you're all dying to know. When you do so wisely choose to become a member of their site...you know, to take more of their pry-for-personal-information quizzes... rest assured, it's free! Or so they say. (just make sure you don't take the "Are you a Sexy wife" quiz where they ask you for your social security and credit card numbers!)

I know this is random. but I had to feel like there was some sort of purpose in my taking that quiz. So here it is. It's to keep YOU from wasting YOUR time. Yeah yeah...what are friends for, right? *wink*