April 29, 2008

A ride home. A kid's Bible. A baffled mom.

*This picture does not necessarily represent the Bible-in-question. I don't know which one she was reading. Yet. On our way home from church this past Sunday, both girls were sitting in the back reading their Bibles. It was quiet. Jet and I were having a peaceful conversation. Discussing something of depth. Like our hunger.

Then. From the back of the car came a child's voice. Suddenly and forcefully posing a question that sent our thoughts of lunch out the window as we grasped for heavenly wisdom. In desperate hope of adequately answering a 5 year old.

"Mom. Did David God tell David to kill Goliath?"

I knew where this was going. Charis is an firm believer in upholding the 10 Commandments. One of which clearly states "Thou shall not kill".

I said something that I felt was inspired from On High. (thank you, Jesus) But she wasn't deterred.

"Well, does David always do what God says? Did God TELL David to cut off Goliath's head?!!"

Again our cat-like brainiac reflexes were quick to respond. bringing about more genius answers from The Parental Team. And honestly, I was feeling quite pleased with myself. Patting myself on the back wasn't too far from my thoughts.

Then she started to talk about "Uriah". Only she couldn't pronounce it, so I didn't understand what she was saying. But Jet did.

He whispered "Oh no! She's talking about the story of Bathsheba."

From a KID'S Bible?!

"Uh. Charis, honey. Can you just read to yourself for a while so Mommy and Daddy can talk too? Thanks."

....Yeah. We'll finish this discussion. TEN years from now. Mkay? Who knew I had to censor her reading from a child's Bible?!

And thus, in one fell swoop, The Genius Parental Team went from sitting atop our self-made pedestal to retreating to a dark corner. discussing the best way to confiscate that children's bible. and giving our daughters something safer to read. something that doesn't talk of murder, decapitation, and adultery.

You know, like Dr. Seuss. Then I only have to answer the easy questions like: "What's a Wocket? And is there one in my pocket?"

Update:
The Parental Team is currently regrouping knowing full well that 5-year-old-girl will not adhere to the scheduled plan of 10 years before resuming the above topic of discussion.

11 comments:

Jolanthe said...

wanna give me a heads up on that Bible name when you find it. Although, knowing our house, it's probably one that Zachary ripped the cover off. :)

Jolanthe

Stacy said...

We've been there. A friend once told me something that an older woman had told her: Read them the Bible, and don't edit it. And let the Holy Spirit sort it all out. So we've done this, with our kids. Mark reads them from the Bible, and they've covered um, well- many of those sorts of difficult "we don't really want to go there yet" topics that come up in the Bible. And what we've found is that the Holy Spirit does sort it out. Most of the time it goes right over their heads. And when it doesn't, we give them a simple, straightforward answer. For the Bathsheba one, I'd probably say something like, "Well, yes, honey. David wasn't married to Bathsheba. She was married to a man named Uriah, and David took her for himself, which is a sin."
And they accept that and move on. Many times they leave it at that.

Fun times, though, huh? I love your whole "The Parental Team" remarks. You're funny!

~Stacy

Laura said...

My daughter has the same questions. I agree with Stacy, it seems like God always provides the right answer. As much as Bathsheba and David is difficult to explain, wait until she finds Sodom and Gomorah! : )

Diane Meyer said...

Just happened by and read your blog.
1. That is the bible my kids read. I don't remember all the controversial questions. Good luck with that. :-)
2. Your kids are absolute dumplings. Oh my gosh. How do you get anything done??
Diane

javamamma said...

I like Stacy's comment. I think we sometimes 'over protect' our kids when God wants to speak to them on their level....even through barbaric stories. :)

Tracy said...

The questions get even better the older they get! That is how I (note: I, ME, NOT Ryan) ended up being kind of thrown into "the talk" with Dallas. We were reading something during homeschooling in Proverbs. Yea, that one can bring up a lot of questions.

Christin said...

Actually, to be clear, we don't shy away from the harder topics of the bible. But we had JUST talked about Abraham sacrificing Isaac. YESTERDAY we talked about Sodom and Gomorrah. Everyday it's at least one hard topic of discussion.

And honestly, sometimes you just need a break from the rapid fire of deep questions.

Sometimes you just need a breather from being the President of Theology. Preschool Division.

So this was just a humorous take on what's the norm with C. around our house. So Jet and I won't forget. Not a confessional that we put an eternal lid on the hard stuff. :)

Bek said...

:) so real life

we are deciding right now whether to let israel see the rest of Gospel of John -which He LOVES - but JESUS gets crucified! i mean its fairly mild in that movie - and he wants to see it - he knows what happens - but man o man!

Holy Spirit, we love you, help!!

Bek said...

by the way israel is 3

and what DID you say about david and goliath?

i'm just interested....this is a really helpful post....even if it wasn't meant to be a confessional :)

Foxy5 said...

Oh, maybe I am glad that Joseph isn't reading yet :)

And to think I was just going to do a post about a great Bible I found for Joseph. :)

Mary@notbefore7 said...

We'd like to know which bible that is...wow.

I am sure God will continue to give you all the appropriate answers.

My K is a very face value gal...never getting to far. (like Stacy's comment...a straight foward answer like that one would be very acceptable to K. BUT, she has a friend, Jenna who is such a deep thinker and questioning child. I know Jenna's parents do a bit more "editing" for now.

YOu have to know your kid.