Did I say that?

The end result of my slight oversight.

We have hugely expensive non-stick cookware. Apparently, we need to cash in on our Lifetime Warranty. Because our eggs stuck.

So I, being the keenly impressive housewife, let them sit over night. Completely forgetting about them. Until this morning.

Huh. Well...lets just put some water in that, stick it on the stove, bring it to a boil, and then watch as the hardened eggs come right off. Easy at that. Ah yes, what a brilliant woman my husband is married to.

Except that I didn't add into my genius equation one defining thing: the fact that I am highly distractable and surrounded by highly distracting girls.

*elapse an unknown amount of time as I was called upstairs by the screaming of my child*

As I came back downstairs, there is dark grey smoke billowing everywhere. I yell a few things I wish I hadn't. Looking at the pan on the stove, knowing that it could burst into flames at any moment, I grab ahold of it and jerk the door to a back porch open. Throw it on a cement patch...so as to not cause any the grass to go up in flames...and hose it down with our handy-dandy water hose beside the cement slab.

I'm sure at this point that my neighbor is outside in his shed. But out of politeness for me, is remaining quietly inside it. If only my girls could have had the same mindset. Instead they come out the backdoor, loudly asking, "Mommy, what's Shit mean?!" over and over.

*big sigh* Ah yes. What a lovely moment.

Seriously, I'm not one to use vulgar language. But of course, out of ALL the other things that my girls could have picked up on...the smoke that was filling the house, the pan that was sizzling outside, my obvious horror...they would hone in on the one word they've never heard before.

Ahh, such is the life of a parent. You have yourself fooled into thinking that you are the one that is watching out for their slip-ups...to help mold them into "good, upstanding" people. But it's really the other way around. THEY will be the ones that pick up on your slip ups and present them to you...and everybody else within earshot.

Note to self: Never walk out of the kitchen when something is on the stove...preparing to boil. And practice saying "Oh Glory!" over and over again so that the next time I walk into a room that is about to burst into flames, that will come out of my mouth instead...